brain blobs and verbal vomit

Oh look, it is Thursday and I haven't posted anything in a week.  Has anyone noticed or is this just one less thing you feel obliged to read?  I guess that sounded cranky...oh well, it is 100+ degrees outside so I have a pass on crankiness.

All I have for today is a little story from the check out line at Target...although once I put it on the preview page I realize it kind of isn't a little story.  There are a lot of words going on here.


Also as I am cranky I am going to put all of the cursing in bold caps.

So I will start the story with me being finished at Target and I am in the check out area surveying which lane will get me out of here the fastest.  Everyone was leaving the line I was in because of a price check issue.  Oh well, I will stand in the line since I am now second in line and would be 4th in line at any of the other lanes. The manager is right there on a walkie with someone getting the price and the cashier is ringing out the rest of the stuff.  So I unload my cart...

Cashier makes the comment to the kid with the lady "I like your Marvin the Martian shirt!"  Then he proceeds to use his best Marvin the Martian voice and say something about blowing up the world.  The kid and kid's mom are just standing there with a blank stare.  I am sure the kid has no clue about anything Marvin the Martian except that shirt.

As this is going on I remember; "OH CRAP!  THIS IS THE SUPER GEEK!"  Not that I have anything against super geeks as I am a geek myself you know...but this is a super geek without knowledge on appropriate timing on discussions of geek topics.
The last time I encountered him was probably four months ago and I had worn a Comic-Con t-shirt that day.    Let me just say OMG.  I am pretty sure he peed his pants.  He was very excited about the shirt and then even more so when he found out that 1. I had went and 2. I am a female that went  and finally 3. that I am a female that is talking to him that went --he then was useless to the other customers in the line behind me that were now glaring, snorting, and making  fake cough noises.  I tried to get away but as I am needing the things he has stopped ringing up to have this conversation, I am kind of helpless.  I am not sure how I had gotten out of there but  I was certain that kid must have gotten fired.

Again, let me say I have no problem talking with geeks and geeklings about anything geek...but there is a time and place - neither of which are in the check out line while you are supposed to be ringing out people.  People that are in line are DONE being in the store.  They don't want to stand around with their carts full of stuff hanging out.

Anyway, I was surprised he is still there.  How has he not been let go to fulfill his dream working at Gamestop or the Fantasy Shop? SHIT.  I am in his line.  Quickly I look down at my shirt to make sure that I have no geeky/pop-culture ironic t-shirt on.   WHEW!  I have on a Gino's East shirt.  I am in the clear.  He starts ringing out my stuff and then starts saying something like "OH, I see you have brought a young Jedi to shop."  

CRAP!  The kid had on a Lego Star Wars shirt.  So then the cashier (man, I wish I knew his name since I am writing about him but I was trying to avoid eye contact as it is over 100 degrees outside and everyone is cranky that is in the store and these people don't want to be in this checkout!)...he starts in talking about how there are books on Star Wars for people of all ages and soon I should make sure that I start getting him the books (if this were not the check out line with people behind us, this is where I would have said "oh, he has a picture book"  but I kept it zipped).  

Then, the man with his kids behind us in line I guess was hoping to move things along and says to me "Gino's East?  Is there one around here?"  So I say "Sadly no.  My husband is from the Chicago area."  That guy then says "That's where we are from -"  

- And it is super geek cashier with the cut off.  His interest is now on the man behind me in line.  Forget the little fact that he hasn't completed checking my stuff out.  He starts in to that guy with "I went to a concert there a few months ago at the blah blah blah"  So guy asks what concert.  Super geek is being all shy now and says "Oh, a German heavy metal band.  I am sure you don't know it"  The guy presses further and asks what band.  Super geek replies "Ramstein"  At this point eyes go to me since the snickering sound that I was imagining in my head was audible to those around me.  So I just blurted out what I was thinking in my head that made me snicker..."I had no idea they were still doing stuff"  I stopped there and did not volunteer that I had seen them way back in '98 on a Family Values Tour (CRAP 1998!  That is a long time ago and the first Family Values Tour.  Wonder where super geek was at in 1998").

Then the conversation goes on to super geek bragging about how great it is that they have this "super bus" where it is cheap to travel to Chicago - Yeah, he is still checking out my stuff and talking to the other guy.  He has also forgotten that I brought my own bags and started cramming the last of my things in a plastic bag. "Oops, sorry! I got caught up in the conversation."  - in my head my smart ass is thinking "gee really?  I hadn't noticed"

Finally though I am finished and can leave the store only to step out onto the surface of the sun.  Yes, I think this is the 3rd time I have mentioned something about the heat.

The End

Yeah, it almost seems that all I do is sit and watch the SYFY channel...but that isn't the case.  This one was accidental.

I was working on planning out a sewing project that will be part of the Comic-Con postings next month -yes, I can't work on posts for this month because I am busy writing future posts.  What is wrong with me?

Anyway...I was working on this sewing project and I had flipped on the TV for background noise and there it was.  Another fine SYFY film.  Carny.  I was like "no way!  A terrible movie with carnival folk in it? Score!"  

Even better, this film had star power - LOU DIAMOND PHILLIPS!  Okay, so not super bright star power.  Is his star tarnished or is the bulb out?  I am not sure.  Remember when he was the shit?  Or was he the shit ever?  Did he just do a few awesome movies?  Young Guns?  La Bamba?  Crap!  I see that he is slated for "Arachnaconda" for 2013.  I am sure that will be another fine SYFY film!

Alright, the story on this movie is pretty much what you would imagine.  There is a circus freak show that has come to town.  They have one creature though that is the "devil"...some gargoyle looking thing.

The town preacher goes all "Westboro" on them and protests the freak show.  Lou Diamond Phillips is the Sheriff that makes sure everything is in order with the permits and doesn't see anything wrong with letting the show go on.  Nothing illegal here.  

Well, as you may have guessed, this "devil" gets loose and starts killing people in town.  Did I mention that this creature is HORRIBLE CGI - or did I even have to mention that part?
The cover there leads you to believe it would be pretty awesome.  Unfortunately they blew the budget on the cover art and Lou Diamond Phillips (I am just going to call him LDP from now on) so there wasn't any money in actually writing the script.  So bad dialogue, not a great story...but there are some good scenes of the carnage.  Hmm, I guess that is the best thing besides the cover art.  The effects guys did do a great job on their dead bodies.  

I wish I could tell you how the movie ends...(well, I don't really. It neither good enough nor horrible enough to care).  The kid woke up from his nap so while I was dealing with that, the movie went on.  I didn't pause it or anything.  I just came in to see LDP bleeding so I guess he died.  Did they kill or capture the beast?  I don't know.  I don't even feel bad about not knowing.  I think having LDP in it made me not care.  Like it made the movie not as terrible as it should have been.

I will hand it to SYFY though, they have some SYFY originals coming up that I am going to have to watch.

Arachnoquake with Edward Furlong and Tracy Gold and Bigfoot with Danny Bonaduce and Barry Williams.  

Yes.  It is just as you have guessed.  SYFY is where child stars go to die when they grow up and cannot find other work. 

SYFY, let me tell you what would make these better is if their character names were John Connor, Carol Seaver, Danny Partridge, and Greg Brady. That would be awesome.  Imagine the ridiculous story lines on that!  Did John Connor come back in time or is it now the future?  Is Skynet causing the Arachnoquake?  Did Carol Seaver have to..wait?  What did Carol's character ever do on Growing Pains besides whine about stuff?  In Bigfoot, was there a Battle of the Bands between the Partridge Family and The Brady Bunch and Bigfoot got pissed and had to stomp it out?   

Man, I am going to be disappointed now when I watch these!

Last week my toddler kept saying "BASEBALL!"  He was stomping all over the house saying it so I asked him if he wanted to go to a baseball game.   "YES!" he shouts and gets all excited.  Okay then, I was going to take my kid to a baseball game.

People take their kids to baseball games all the time so everything should be fine right?  I really didn't understand why we were not going to all three games of the series anyway.  The White Sox (the husband's team) were in town playing the Cardinals (my team).  I mean, we went to all three games last time they played each other up in Chicago, so why weren't we going to the games when they were right here in town?  This I will never know as I really don't want to get inside the brain of the husband.  I am afraid what rattles around in there.

Anyhow, the husband was working so the child and I were going alone.  I had never been more nervous going to a game.  Not because my kid decided to wear White Sox gear (YES, my child decided to wear White Sox while I wore Cardinals.  It looked like I stole a kid from visiting fans!) but because it was just me and the kid.

Sure, The kid and I go lots of places by ourselves but there was a lot more people at this one and my kid isn't always the best at holding my hand.  He is at that age where he thinks it is funny to wiggle free and take off running.  So I explained to him that there were going to be a lot of people and he had to make sure to hold my hand so that he wouldn't get lost from me.  I also told him that if he didn't that we would be going right back home.  I kept saying this over and over all the way...then he was distracted by the Arch.   "THE ARCH!" he keeps saying.  I told him we were going to the game first (yeah, we had tickets so not throwing that $ away) and maybe we would go by afterward.  Sure, that was a lie since it was an evening game and I figured by 8 or 9 he would be tired and we would leave and the Arch would be forgotten.

We park at the lot right in front of the ballpark and he is ecstatic that the stadium is right there.  He keeps shouting "BASEBALL!"   This draws attention to us and lots of people are laughing and pointing...because I have on my Cardinals and he has on his White Sox. We get into the game and the kid does great holding my hand.  He gives lots of high-fives to Sox fans that think he is the greatest for choosing what they feel is the right team.

We got there early so we could eat before the game.  I thought it would be too hard to hold his hand and then carry drink, hotdogs, fries, etc. with the other hand to our seats...well guess what, it is hard to carry all of that stuff to the tables that are just a few feet away.  Man, what do other people do?  I need another hand.   Do people wait until kids are old enough to hold their own food and follow without having to hold hands?  Did I screw up?  Oh well, we made it to the table, he ate...well, he kept crying for baseball and pointing to the field.  I guess he thought the game was going to start as soon as he got into his seat.

We get to our seats and there is a large group of White Sox fans around us that love my kid.  I guess it is great because not only is he for their team but he is also defying mommy...my little rebel.  One of the fans came back on a beer run and acted like he was going to give my kid a beer and said "for the other Sox fan" - it was funny.

We watched the game, and at about the 5th inning he starts in asking about the Arch and wanting his picture with the Arch.  First off, yes I take a lot of pictures of my kid so naturally he wants a picture.  Second, crap he didn't forget about the Arch.  I tell him after the inning is over with  we can then leave for the Arch.  By this time it is nearing 9 and past his bedtime anyway.  I really didn't want to walk to the Arch grounds with just us two, so when we got close enough for him to see it, I took his picture. He is super happy that I have that picture of him with the Arch in the background.  I guess that needs to be another trip to go and see the Arch when it isn't night.

I survived my evening and the Cards won the game (and series).

I love AIR-CON and I do not know that I can live without it!  It is one of the best things ever!

A little obsessed with AIR-CON you say? I bet you are too.
Oh, you say you are not?  I am talking about Air Conditioning.  I bet you are all over the AIR-CON now.

Sure this is a story that should probably die but as the Facebook Timeline shows, things never die...and besides maybe my experience can prevent someone from doing something stupid- or maybe it will just become a blueprint of what to do if stupid is on the menu.  Also I have no problem sharing embarrassing stories - just usually it is for friends and not searchable on the web.  #YOLO (is this cliche now?)

It's the weekend so drinking might be in the forecast...I can say "try to be sensible" but as you will see, it isn't always easy and I don't always follow my own advice..

Let me begin by stating that the below story is about a trip without the child.  He was safe at home having a sleepover with Grandma.
In my posting about the Kentucky Derby and Giant Hats, it was mentioned that the hat was made for my Vegas trip when I wagered on the Derby.  One of the photos from that posting showed a yard drink container with a strap...you figured there would have to be a story about it right?

Once you reach a certain age maybe getting "a yard" of your favorite beverage might not be the best idea...maybe age has nothing to do with it.  Maybe yards shouldn't be consumed unless you are sharing.  I wasn't sharing and it was Vegas (cue up whatever song reminds you of The Hangover movies)
There was a place on the strip that would make you whatever drink you wanted in the container (it was near Harrah's of you were wondering, but with that LINQ project, who knows where it is now).  So vodka and cranberry juice it was.  Not a bad deal, it was $36 and hella strong.  So strong I do not remember most of the night.  Look at me in the above photo.  So happy proud of my drink that comes with a strap.  I don't even care that the Vegas weather has made my ankles become kankles.

When my husband woke up the next morning, he was surprised that I had already been up and showered.  I was surprised that he was surprised.  I am always up before he is.  So then I opened the mini fridge in the room to get a water and found a few bottles of red liquid.
     "What is this?" I ask.
The husband answered,
     "OH, do you want to know the story for that?  You were going to be 'economical.'  That is all you kept saying. 'I am going to be economical' and you attempted to pour what was left in your yard into those empty water bottles.  I guess you were going to save money on drinks today."

I   AM   BRILLIANT!   Well not really, those drinks tasted like cough medicine. Not even good cough medicine.  The generic kind where you need a glass of water to get that taste washed away.  Yeah, I tried to drink them. Bleh.  But that story explained all the pink stained towels in the bathroom.  I had figured it was puke related. Yay, I didn't puke! He just said that I made a huge mess in the bathroom.  Imagine being intoxicated and trying to pour from a yard container into the small mouth of a water bottle.  Of course there was a mess.

So what else happened the night before?  As the story above with being "economical," everything was relayed as a story from the husband.  He isn't good with details so I didn't even get to paint a colorful picture in my mind.

Here is what happened...we apparently ventured into several casinos and shops on our walk back to our hotel.  Yeah, walk.  Why walk when we had passes for the monorail? Because I was wasted and apparently wanted to walk the nearly 2 miles down the strip.  We didn't win any money and I am pretty sure money was lost.  My camera was full of images that I had to later ask the husband what made me take the picture and where we were.


This one for instance we were at O'Sheas (RIP O'Sheas - no, I didn't kill the place.  They are being torn down for the new LINQ thingy on the strip. Their last day was April 30th, 2012).  Yes, I am having Subway.  Footlongs were $8 last year.  He said I was singing "8. 8 dollar.  8 dollar foooot loooooong" (which around here they are $5) and then thought it was funny that my drink could sit on the floor and still be at the table for me to drink out of while I ate my sandwich. Because I apparently am a hungry drunk.  Speaking of the drink sitting on the floor, I also noticed that I had drunken texted a friend and told her how I could pee and drink from my yard at the same time.  Of course there had to be bathroom breaks involved with that drink...but why wouldn't I hang that on the hook by the strap?  Ick!  I put that thing on the bathroom floor and drank out of it while peeing.

Most of the other pictures are a blurry mess and were taken further down the strip.  My thoughts on this are that the drink was empty and lighter which made using a camera while drinking easier.  Here are a few of the non-blurry pictures.


I was told that I thought the Family Guy pinball machine was "awesome" and it was at the Riviera and that I took a picture of the Circus Circus sign because clowns are funny sometimes.

This though is a picture that should be embarrassing but I laugh at it every time I see it.  According to the husband I wanted a picture in front of the hotel.  He said I ran across the street and as I was telling him to take my picture, I just flopped back into the grass and then started blabbing about how soft and cold the grass was.  I bet he was relieved that we were so close to the hotel before I started falling down everywhere.

Nope, he didn't divorce me yet.  I think I was his personal comedy show that night.

I would say if you were going to try this, make sure you are with a group in case walking 2 miles doesn't work out for you and have your painkillers and water on your nightstand just in case---actually, don't do this.  It probably isn't as funny for the people with you than it is to the people that just hear the story.

Okay kids, Don't drink and drive and remember to keep hydrated.

YES!


This week inadvertently became MTV theme week with the Yo! MTV Raps, the MTV shirt to tank project, and now this movie.

While this movie was a "SYFY Original" movie, the Jersey Shore is garbage that is now on MTV.

I missed the advertisements for this film but thanks to friends and Facebook, I did not miss it!

I have now watched this movie.  OMG.  I don't know that I would call it the greatest worst movie ever, but it is BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD.

I do not watch the Jersey Shore, well I watched one episode and felt like I had lost more brain cells than if I were on all drugs ever manufactured at the same time.

This movie spoofs the Jersey Shore so we have TC 'The Complication', Nooki, J-Moni, Donnie, Paulie Balzac, and BJ.   Like I said, I didn't watch Jersey Shore but I know enough that these are poking fun...oh, and don't forget the ASS for Alcohol, Sun, Sex instead of the GTL for Gym, Tan, Laundry!

Were you sad because there were no "Real" Jersey Shore actors on this?  Fear not because the real Vinnie from Jersey Shore does make a cameo as a newscaster for what would be the worst news program ever!

This is the classic story where there is a group (Guidos) that believes there are shark attacks but no one (Preppies) believes them until it is too late...the too late is when a singing star *cough cough * Joey Fatone, is killed.  This is when the race is on to catch the shark.  A shark is caught but it isn't the right shark (Jaws anyone?).

This movie ripped off several better movies during the time I will never get back.

...okay, I give up on this review.  I went to look something up and found this AWESOME review complete with screen shots containing snarky comments.  It is the review I would do if I had more time.

I will hang my head in shame as you go check out this review on tv.com.

It just so happened that yesterday's post mentioned MTV and a possible future post about making a T-shirt into a tank if I didn't screw it up. Guess what, I didn't screw it up!

Browsing Pinterest I ran across a few links for T-shirt to tanks a while back.  I thought this one was great for the simplicity factor and this one for that bit in the front where it is gathered (because separating log o' boob is nice...of course I don't end up using it on this shirt but maybe in the future).  I then thought about the massive collection of novelty T-shirts that the husband and I both have and knew I would be re-purposing some of those shirts.

Anyway, last week Target had some of their T-shirts on sale for $7..like I needed another T-shirt, but they had and MTV shirt!  (yeah, I was already feeling nostalgic about MTV before watching the special that was on yesterday).

So, making this into a tank top...
It is really simple to do even if you cannot sew that well.- because believe me, I do not sew very well.

Items you will need

• T-Shirt
• Scissors
• Straight pins (you could probably get by without but I recommend them)
• Sewing Machine
• Thread (same color as shirt makes it look like you bought it this way)

After you sew that straight seam, cut the end of that bottom seam you removed way back in the beginning and thread it through both the front and back of the shirt.  These are the shoulder straps.  You can either figure out the perfect length, sew the ends together and tuck the seam in - or you can have it tie on the side.

All of the edges are raw on this shirt except that one line sewn at the top on front/back for the straps/tie.  So super easy.  So this is how it turned out.  I might do some more tweaking on the dart thing (only 85% happy with that) and will be making more, just not today.  This really didn't take long...oh, you want an exact time?  Couldn't tell you.  I stopped during the process to take pictures and was working on dinner plus entertaining a toddler.  Lots of interruptions...maybe 30 minutes total?  It would definitely be more time productive to work on several at a time.

What a great world we live in.  A world where most questions can be answered with a few clicks on a keyboard.

I say this after I had an "OMG what was that song?!?" moment.

VH1 was showing "Yo: The Story of Yo! MTV Raps" --remember that show? SIDEBAR-  Remember when MTV showed videos?  MTV was great in the late 80's/early 90's. Whoah, check out this image I found.  Who the F-bleeeeeeeeep was wearing this?

ERMAHGERD FERSHERN WERS BERD EN DER NERNDEES!

In spite of the above fashion travesty, MTV had music videos and great shows (not just teen mom nonsense)...OOOH, Remember the VJs?

So anyway, I was watching this special about Yo MTV Raps! and was reminiscing about MTV and then imagesof music videos pop into my head  (really I cannot tell you the last time I have seen a music video on TV) so then I am thinking about this music video and cannot think of the song or who the band was.  I just remember that it was the early '90s and there is a dude in a Charlie Brown shirt and they are skateboarding in the pool...I also want to say that I seen the video on a show that Pauly Shore was hosting...teehee...the Weeeeaaa-Seheeeellllll (that is how he said Weasel. You remember Gen-Xers right?).

As this is driving me nuts that I cannot remember even a few bars of this song - a GOOGLE search then occurred. I typed in what I remembered from the video and BAM there it was, Someone else had to do this same exact thing on New Years Eve 2010.  What kind of party was this guy having?  Flashback New Years?
Okay, so I am done laughing over the fact that this song must just be mediocre - otherwise if it sucked really bad or was really good then it would be more memorable than the freaking video.  I remember the song being pretty awesome but I guess it wasn't.  Since you have seen that my google search was successful, you probably want to know the song now too.
Yeah, the skateboarding isn't even that good.  Sad when that is more memorable than the band name and song.  Oh well. -Incidentally, I did pick up an MTV shirt with retro logo over the weekend and I will be attempting to make it into a tank top.  If I don't screw it up there will be a blog tutorial so you ladies can make use of some of those boxy shirts sitting around.

But seriously, isn't it great where you can just Google a few words and you can come up with what you are looking for?   What would we have done before?  Let it eat away in our brain until we forgot?  Bugged friends until we could find someone that remembered?   It isn't like it is something you could go look up at the library.  Looking up things on the internet is great!  I even use "Dr. Google" for all sorts of self-diagnosing on ailments.

The Internet.  It went from something that the government used to a part of everyday life.  Is this how we are almost dependent on it for work, news, and entertainment.

I had an issue last week where my DSL service was out.  They told me everything was fine and the problem was in my house.  Oh it felt like the end of the world.  I just knew there was no way at all that it was in my house as I did not change anything at all.  Technically I was right.  The problem was between their box and my house.  So outside. My dad was able to fix the damaged wire and whew,  life was restored!

That day with no internet...should it have made me feel like I had lost a limb or major organ when it was out?  I shouldn't but it did.  I remember back when I was first introduced to internet in college with dial-up, slip accounts, and KERMIT (please tell me you are you as old as me and know what I am talking about  and that you don't think I am talking about calling someone about undergarments for a Muppet.)

Well, those interwebs have come a long way.  From having that one PC to having constant internet with three computers, three gaming systems, satellite TV, DVD player, streaming movies, and handheld gaming systems all wired in.  When it is down, it is like a major loss.  It was hard not being entertained or having all of my questions answered with the simple google search.

I guess that is the way that our Nation will be crippled.  In a few years when everyone has conformed to technology, we will be hit...it will be like the end of the world.

That then reminds me of Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome...Master Blaster runs Bartertown!

Man, I was all over the place with this one...don't be thinking I am Schizophrenic.  Dr. Google says no.

Why do I think of this dopey movie when I think of High School reunions?  American Pie just had a reunion movie too.  I don't think I know anyone that seen it...wonder if it sucked.  Perhaps I will check it out when it comes to the dollar show...oh, it is at the dollar show.  It must not have done that well.

My high school reunion is this weekend.  Dare I say it is my twenty year reunion?  20.  EEEEEK.  How am I old enough to have a 20 year reunion?  I work with someone that is 20 years old.  I have been out of high school as long as she has been on the earth.  YIKES.

Are these the types of thoughts that will make me get a boyfriend half my age and and a convertible?  Isn't that what happens?  Eww.  That would make me Cougar.  BARF.  I don't feel like investing time in that ridiculousness.

I guess you are only as old as you feel right?  I don't feel old.  Should I feel old?

You will be saying WTF when you get to the story on this one.  Seriously, WTF.

About a week ago I was flipping channels and seen on CHILR a movie called "My Name is Bruce."  I hit info and was immediately sucked in by the description:
"Oregon townspeople recruit 'Evil Dead' star Bruce Campbell to battle real demons."

Ooooh, this reminds me of Galaxy Quest.  That was a bad movie too!

Anyway,  You know Bruce Campbell.  He is most famous for his work as Ash in the Evil Dead films, was in Hercules and Xena T.V. series and has been in too many Sci-fi "thrillers" to name...well, maybe not too many to name but I don't feel like listing them as there are some stinkers on the list.

So Bruce not only plays himself, but he co-produced and directed this cinematic masterpiece.   This movie pretty much makes fun of his career and the crappy movies he has been in.

The story..

Teenagers accidentally set free a demon named Guan-Di who was guarding the souls at the cemetery of Chinese laborers.  Jeff, the lone survivor of this group of teenagers, kidnaps his idol, Bruce Campbell to save the town.  Yes.  This teenager thinks that the terrible characters that Bruce plays in his terrible movies are real and he has skills to save the town.

Bruce thinks that this is a real movie and is the ultimate birthday present from his agent and plays along with the town.

There is a town meeting where the crisis is discussed.  Bruce still thinking that this is an act goes along with everything.  Superfan Jeff takes him back to his place to freshen up.  This place is a SHRINE to Bruce Campbell.  - here is where some nuggets of info come to play.  The memorabilia in this shrine are either property of Bruce or are made up for this movie most of the movie was filmed on Bruce's property. 

At some point Bruce figures out it is real and runs away.  This is when he finds out that everyone (including his dog who is named Sam 'n Rob after Sam Raimi and Rob Tapert who have worked with Bruce Campbell on lots of projects) dislikes him.  The only person that doesn't hate him is Jeff, that kid who kidnapped him to begin with.  Oh no, that kid is going to take on Guan-Di on his own.  This is where Bruce gets some balls and decides to go and help so he can save Jeff.  Why?  Because he thinks Jeff;s mom is hot.

Bruce, Jeff, and Jeff's mom get some bean curd and figure out how to trap Guan-Di...cut to them screening the film to where you say "oh, it really was a film all along" - but SURPRISE! Guan-Di pops out for the shocker ending.

 There were tons of movie references and spoofs littered throughout this movie but I know the question on your mind - What does Guan-Di have to do with bean curds?  Is it his kryptonite?

Guan-Di - the Chinese God of bean curd. Seriously.  As legend goes, when Guan-Di (Kuan-Ti) was mortal, he sold bean curd/tofu.
You know you want to watch and listen.  It is the McCain brothers (incidentally they have written their own terrible movie called "Killer Tumbleweeds"  - yes,  this one might be too terrible to watch).

You have to admit, it is a little catchy...
Guan you
Guan me
Guan Di
Guan Di is his name...

I haven't posted a craft in over a month.  I think a craft is due.

This craft is just a silly one, but really I guess all of my crafts are on the silly side.  It was just begging to be done after a friend's thread on Facebook.
Yes, She posted about eating fried bologna and I commented (I am the green). I did really picture her drinking her cider from a mason jar. It completed the picture in my mind.
 I already had the E-6000 glue.  It works great for gluing glass.  I don't know that I have ever seen the E-6000 on sale, but Hobby Lobby has the 40% off one item coupon on their website so print it and use it!
 Flip the jars upside-down, spread the adhesive on the candlestick, and stick it on the center of the bottom of the jar.  Let it set up overnight.

TADA!  Now you have a pair of Hillbilly Goblets.  It should be common sense that these should be hand wash only, but I will say it anyway DO NOT STICK THESE IN THE DISHWASHER!

A perfect gift for a friend that eats fried bologna and drinks cider....Could you imagine how fun it would be to break these out at a backyard BBQ?  I think they would look great on those red/white tablecloths.

This has nothing to do with vomiting so read on.

I went to a fabulous wedding and reception in Bloomington, Indiana over the weekend.  It was my first time being in the state of Indiana. 

Of course the term "HOOSIER" was thrown around quite a bit.  Everyone in Indiana is proud to be a Hoosier.  I couldn't help but be a kid inside giggling because as my STL friends know, Hoosier has a different meaning in our locality.

Why is that?  Why is being a Hoosier great every place else in the states except for in the St. Louis area where it is a derogatory term? Even Wikipedia singles out St. Louis, MO as having a different meaning.  Was there a point where St. Louis thought themselves better than the Indian-- wait, are they Indians? Indianans? Indianians?

My husband is from the Chicago area and said that when he first heard the term he thought "how do they know if they are from Indiana."  Then the shoe was on the other foot when I made my first visit to the Chicago area and had to explain what hoosier means in STL.  Nothing makes STL sound more low-class than having to explain the derogatory meaning.

Why is this?  Where did this come from?

In searching the web, I found several stories stating that the STL meaning came about from a strike that happened earlier in the century.  Apparently there was a strike of some sort and scab workers came from Indiana.  Several stories refer to this happening in the 1930's but I could not find what the strike was over.  There were so many things happening in the 1930's...streetcar strikes, gas union strikes, the great migration, the depression, etc.  I am only as good as my "Google" abilities and just couldn't come up with the exact strike or year.

I can see how it is hard to find the origin of our STL term since there seems to be lots of argument on how the Hoosier term came to be in the state of Indiana.

Whatever the details are, I can see how if there were a strike of some sort and people came from Indiana and kept the work going...yeah, that would screw up the impact of the strike and I can see people saying "Damn Hoosiers!" and it becoming a bad thing from that.

In trying to find out the Hoosier thing, I found out something else.  Missouri had a nickname.  No, not that "Show Me State" thing....The Puke state.  THE PUKE STATE.  What the F does that mean?

I will get into that in a minute.  But first check out this neato map.  I think I want to print this puppy out!

This fabulous lithograph is by Mackwitz (from STL) made in 1884.  This was made for the H.W.Hill & Co. of Decatur, IL who manufactured rings and such for hogs and cattle.  You can find this in the Library of Congress if you want to learn more.

Right there on that map up there is a pig puking for "Missouri the Puke State" - why?  All I can find is some reference having to do with Galena Lead mines and a gathering of Missourians where a comment was made that it was like Missouri had taken a puke...because the Missourians gathered must have been what us STL folks would call hoosiers.

Hoosiers and Pukes.  Name calling.   That brings us full circle right?

I had started writing this post right after we returned from our last trip...I jotted down some travel tips and I was going to add more but I guess that is all that I can think of for now.  They mostly have to do with flying as I have flown a lot over the last several years.
It is vacation time...maybe one of these might help you on your trip


1.  Bringing beverages through airport security is a no no. The same drink that you could get on the outside of the airport for $1 is now magically $3+ in the airport.  Guess what, empty water bottles are allowed. I have kept a slew of the vitamin water bottles that I use at home.  I like that the top is large enough that ice cubes fit in it.

so Empty water bottle + water from water fountain at the airport after passing through security = water (saving you that $3 or more if you refill).  Guess what else, those Mio drink mix thingies are allowed to go through security as well as those single serve drink mix packets.  So there is your flavored beverage.

2.  Speaking of security...yeah, wear slip on shoes and pants that don't need a belt.  Don't go crazy with the jewelry.  You don't have to look like a bum but you don't have to get all gussied up to be smashed between two strangers for a few hours.  Be comfortable.  It is just easier that way.  It is funny travelling and seeing people that have not flown in the past 10+ years and have no clue of the rules.  There is always one person like this going through TSA and half the time they are in the line in front of me.  These rules can be found online and you would think that surely these people have friends that have flown that could have clued them in.  Last flight there was a guy that had a pocket knife and he was surprised that it was an issue.  If you aren't MacGyver, you don't need a pocketknife in flight.  Put that in your suitcase or leave it at home.

3.  Make your carry on bag a backpack.  Sure you can fit more in those rolling suitcases but sometimes flights are full and everyone has brought that suitcase plus a personal item that they have stuffed in those bins.  Now what? The flight is full and they have to check your suitcase at the gate.  Backpacks fit perfectly under that seat in front of you.  Since we have been traveling with the toddler both my husband and I wear backpacks.  Mine full of diapers, wipes, etc and the husband's full of electronics and toys.  I am also going to stick the purse info here.  Ladies, we all know we like to carry around big pretty purses full of stuff.  If you are on vacation, let's try to scale down to a small bag that will be "hands-free" and fit across you and over the shoulder.  This allows you to hold onto your kids while you are in a strange place and take pictures.

4.  Get yourself a heavy bag that can roll up and fit in your suitcase along with your clothes.   Why would you need this?  Because guess what --you packed that bag full for the trip but now you bought stuff.  You can say that you wont buy a lot of things but it always happens on trips.  Some hokey souvenir or something will catch your eye.  This bag then comes in handy.  Most of the time it ends up as the dirty clothes bag.  Our last trip was to the beach.  So that bag got to have the beach towel and all of the swimming clothes and shoes that were still damp and sandy.  Then it gets checked in with the other suitcases.

5.  If you are going to be staying somewhere for more than a few days, stop at a store and grab you one of those cheap Styrofoam coolers on that first day...it is easiest on the way from the airport to the hotel.  Then you don't have to go out again.  Pick up some water, juice, milk, beer, etc.  Your hotel has that ice machine to fill that puppy up and keep everything cold.  This way you have alternatives since the only thing available are the overpriced sodas and water in the vending machine or room service.  It is a nice thing to have also if you are staying on the beach.

6.  If a road trip is what you are doing...don't forget to check out Roadside America.  They have fantastic lists for each state of every hokey attraction you can see.  Sure the "seeing the largest ball of twine" is a joke, but you know if you were driving by you would want to stop and see it just to laugh about it later.

With the Men In Black III coming out recently, this was the question that was on my mind.  Not other problems in the world...the question of Will Smith songs to movie ratio was on my mind.

To me it seemed like there were tons of movies with his music in them.  I thought there would be this list where I could just look and verify.  NOPE.  There is no such list compiled.  How can this be?  I started looking at each film and soundtrack/score scouring to find my answers.

Then I just got tired of looking.  So here is all that I found out.

Men in Black -- Men in Black
Men in Black II -- Nod ya Head

Bad Boys-- Bad Boys
Wild Wild West --Wild Wild West - wait! did you know he turned down the role of Neo in The Matrix for this movie? Do you think that The Matrix would have been better?  What about those awful sequels? 

I guess this started back with The Fresh Prince of Bel Air with that title sequence.

Can you think of any more?

There are two movies with no Will Smith song but his children have a part.  Willow  appeared with him in I am Legend and Jayden was in The Pursuit of Happyness...Should I count these?